The Almost Half Finished Jumper
by Con Moto
Summary: When tragedy strikes, will the almost half finished green jumper ever be completed? Or will it always lay abandoned on the couch? One thing's for sure. Severus Snape will have to learn how to knit.
1. The Jumper

"Okay, time to start the sleeves. Knit one, purl one, repeat to the end of the row." Lily Snape muttered to herself, her face screwed up in a look of utmost concentration. Thick knitting needles were in her hands and a ball of green yarn rolled about on the floor of the sitting room.

"Must you do that?" Her husband, Severus, stood against the door frame, his long, jean-clad legs crossed.

"Do what?" Lily barely looked up from her knitting. The needles flashed and clacked as Lily worked at a furious speed.

"Give a running commentary of the instructions to that blasted jumper you're knitting.

Lily looked up and smiled. Severus joined her on the squashy couch. "I don't mean to do it, you know. Saying the instructions out loud helps me to understand them."

Knitting had recently become Lily's new hobby. She was constantly gushing over patterns she had found and asked Molly Weasley to teach her how to knit. Lily was very proud when Molly said she was a natural. So, with her new found skill, she decided to knit a jumper for her son Harry. Severus was skeptical, as she insisted on knitting the Muggle way. But he had been surprised so far. At the present time, the jumper was green in colour and almost half finished. Lily had just started on the sleeves. There had only been minor disasters so far and Lily was ecstatic. It was actually quite humorous to watch her excitement.

Lily held up the jumper in front of her. "It's going to look gorgeous when it's finished. The colour will complement Harry's eyes beautifully. There will be cables and eyelets and- what are you smirking at?" she asked crossly.

Severus simply smiled and pulled her close. "It will be gorgeous, especially when Harry wears it. You've done a great job so far." He kissed the top of her fiery red head. Lily put down the knitting and snuggled up to her husband.

"Maybe when this one's done, you'll let me knit you a jumper too."

Severus laughed. "Yes, _if_ I let you." he said dryly. "Knitting's all you've been doing recently, and I'd much rather do something else together." Lily smirked at the innuendo.

They sat in a contented silence for a while, Severus' arms looped around Lily's slim waist.

Just as Severus was wondering where their son was up too, the sound of three year old feet could be heard, padding lightly on the carpeted floor. Harry Snape entered the room, promptly ran to his father and jumped into his lap.

"Oof! You should be a little more careful around your old daddy, Harry." Severus said teasingly. Little Harry giggled, the sound bringing a smile to his parent's faces. Harry was the joy of Lily and Severus' lives. He had jet black hair from his father and inherited his mother's brilliant green eyes. He constantly sported a mischievous look that Severus was sure didn't come from himself.

"Silly Daddy! You're not old." Harry then turned to his mother. "Have you been knitting, Mummy?" Lily nodded as Harry's chubby arms reached over her and took the half knitted jumper in his hands. Harry handled it ever so carefully; he didn't want to "drop a stitch", as Mummy always said. He was so excited that he would be a getting a bright green, homemade jumper all for himself. And what's more, one from his own Mummy! Harry felt like a very lucky boy indeed. He felt sorry for all the little girls and boys that didn't get a jumper from their mummies and hoped Mummy would finish his quickly.

"When do you think you'll finish it, Mummy?" Harry asked curiously.

"Very soon, I expect." Lily answered, ruffling Harry's hair.

"Well I certainly hope it will be finished soon. Remember what we spoke about earlier?" Severus said suggestively. Both he and Lily laughed loudly at Harry's confused expression.

The little family talked and joked with each other for a while longer. Harry had somehow initiated a tickling fight between his parents and all three of them ended up sprawled on the floor, laughing hysterically.

"I suppose I should make a start on dinner." said Lily, her laughter subsiding as she got to her feet. "Food doesn't cook itse-." But Lily didn't get a chance to finish. She stopped in mid-sentence as her face went deathly pale. She swayed violently, and fell to the floor.

"Lily!"

Severus scrambled over to where Lily lay. He checked her breathing.

Her chest wasn't rising and falling like it should have been. Her red hair flared out around her head and her body was cold. It was almost like she was-

No, Severus wasn't going to think like that.

_Please let her be ok, please let her be ok. Oh God, please help. I love her so much. I need her. Harry needs her. Oh God, I can't live without her._

He checked for a pulse.

There was none.

Severus leapt to his feet. His mind was reeling. He couldn't formulate coherent thoughts. In a state of shock, he fetched the emergency Portkey and vaguely told a whimpering Harry to hold on to him. Severus made sure Lily was touching the Portkey and activated it without another moment of hesitation.

There was the unpleasant feeling of being tugged behind the navel and the family arrived in the emergency ward of St. Mungo's.

Meanwhile, in the sitting room of 7 Spinners End, the half-finished green jumper lay abandoned on the couch.


	2. Anguish, Resolve and a Promise

The white halls of St. Mungo's were clean and cold as Severus paced. Harry was curled up into a ball on the chairs just outside the room Lily was in. The little boy was asleep. Severus sighed agitatedly and joined Harry on the seat next to him. He smoothed the wayward strands of hair from Harry's forehead. There was nothing to do except wait. And wait. And wait. It was driving him insane. Severus just had to know how Lily was.

_She's going to be fine. I know she will. She always pulls through._

Why did she collapse? There was nothing wrong. She had been laughing right before she fell to the ground. Severus pressed the heels of his hands onto his forehead. In all his experience with Potions and a small background in Healing, he could not think of a single illness that would strike someone down just like that. A tear escaped his eye. He dashed it away impatiently and continued to wait.

"Mr Snape?" the Healer's voice called softly some time later. Severus got to his feet in an instant and gathered Harry in his arms. His heart plummeted to the bottom of his chest when he saw the Healer's face. This wasn't good.

"Mr Snape, I'm afraid we have bad news..." the Healer trailed off. Severus bumped him aside and ran into Lily's room. He saw her lying on the bed, as though she was asleep. Her brilliant green eyes were closed and she wore a serene expression. Just as she had been when she was laughing. But Severus knew better. The boy in arms was asleep but his mother was not.

Severus stood at the next to the bed. He didn't know what to think. He _couldn't_ think. The Healer joined his side. "Mr Snape, my name is Healer Rowan Moore. I'm afraid your wife has passed away. Her whole body just shut down. Its a silent killer in the wizarding world. The body decides that it's simply not going to work anymore. We don't know anything else about this disease as it is so obscure. We don't even have the funds to start researching." Severus stayed silent and Healer Moore sighed and continued.

"I'm so sorry for your loss, I'll let be right outside if you need me." With that, Healer Moore left the room.

Severus was in shock. He saw Lily's body lying out in front of him, but he wasn't really _seeing_. He did not believe what he saw. It had not sunk in. He cradled Harry closer to his chest. The boy had not woken up yet and Severus didn't want him to wake now. He turned and tripped out of the hospital room in a daze. As soon as he left the room, it all came flooding back.

_"Silly Daddy! You're not old."_

_"When do you think you'll finish it, Mummy?"_

_"Very soon, I expect."_

_The family rolling on the floor, laughing hysterically._

_Then... The sound of Lily's body hitting the floor._

_"Lily!"_

"Lily!" Severus let out an anguished sob. He stuffed Harry into the arms of a startled Healer Moore and ran back into the room. He barely made it back to Lily's still form before collapsing at the bed side, shaking with sobs.

Severus didn't, _couldn't_, say anything. He was beyond that. He cried harder and harder, the heart-rending sobs clawing out of his throat. He felt a hand on his shoulder, but he didn't respond. How could he feel anything now? The most important person in his whole life had left with no warning. Lily would never prance into a room in the way only she could, she would never stare starry-eyed at the night sky, a million and one thoughts flying across her mind, she would no longer laugh at his jokes. God, she would never, ever pick up her knitting again. Lily was gone. She was gone and was never coming back.

"Healer Moore, Alfred is asking for the file- Healer Moore?" a young trainee Healer was trying to get Healer Moore's attention. She knew that a young man and a little boy had come in with a red-headed woman, but other than that, she wasn't quite sure what was going on.

"Healer Moore, are you alright?" she was met with a blank expression on his lined face. She was startled. Her mentor was always so sure of himself and precise in his movements. Now he just seemed lost. He spoke in a low voice.

"Do you know how hard it is to lose a patient? You try everything, _everything_. All you want is for their heart to just keep beating but it doesn't. They die. And a part of you dies with them. You've failed. It's not just yourself you've failed either. The patient's friends and family, all of them are relying on you." Moore sunk low in his chair, dragging a hand across his weary face.

"As a Healer you are trained for these things to happen. But it doesn't soften the blow. Do you know how old that lady was?" The trainee Healer shook her head. She assumed he was talking about the red-haired lady. Healer Moore had not verbalised it, but she was sure she had passed.

"Twenty three. Just twenty three. You should have seen her husband. I have never seen anyone that distraught. He obviously loved her a great deal."

"Did he go home? He had a child with him too..." the trainee trailed off. Another child had lost his mother. A wave of pity washed through her. How awful. She busied herself making some coffee, an unbidden tear falling from her lashes.

"A friend came for him and his child. Lupin, I believe his name was. He said he would take them back to his place." A steaming mug of coffee was passed to him by his student. Moore smiled at her in thanks and took an invigourating sip.

He had seen many cases like that of Lily Snape's. Five other witches and wizards died from the same or similar symptoms in the past month. It was always the same. The completely normal behaviour followed by a sudden paling of the face and collapsing soon after. The victims were all quite young too, between the ages of twenty and thirty. The worst part of it was that no one had any idea what was causing these sudden deaths. As Head Healer, Moore had teams of people working on this mysterious new disease, but to no avail. The long and short of it was that they had no clue where to start and hardly any funding from the Ministry of Magic. This made research extremely difficult. The hospital _needed_ money, but the Minster for Magic, Millicent Bagnold insisted on training camps for Aurors and the like. It was infuriating.

Moore heaved a great sigh and gulped down the rest of his coffee. He got to feet. It was time for him to leave. "Are you alright to finish up here, Jones?"

"Yes sir. Have a safe trip home. I'll see you tomorrow." the young trainee answered.

"Good night Jones." Moore left his office and walked down the stairs. He passed the room he tried to revive Lily Snape. He noticed that someone had taken away her body. Shaking his head, he walked down another flight of stairs into the reception. A cacophony of noise greeted him, with witches and wizards suffering from various ailments rushing to the welcome witch. Despite his despondent mood, Moore had to smirk at the witch's face. He couldn't imagine having her job. With a slight inclination of the head in her direction (which was met with a glare), Moore left the building and strolled to the Underground. He liked taking Muggle transportation. It helped him think. As soon as he boarded the train, the hustle and bustle of the day suddenly seemed insignificant and trivial. It wasn't of course, but sometimes it was nice to feel that it was.

It wasn't that he disliked his job. Quite the opposite actually. Nothing could ever beat the feeling of successfully healing a patient or a making a new medicinal discovery. Except getting married, of course. He smiled softly at what his wife of 35 years would say if he said he felt better doing his job than how he felt on his wedding day.

Nevertheless, no amount of past experience was ever enough when a patient died. His thoughts strayed to the husband of Mrs Snape, Severus and their child. How awful must it be to lose someone like that. Moore wasn't able to get much out of Mr Snape, but he heard him mumble something "she was laughing". At least Lily Snape was happy when she died.

When Mr Snape passed his son to him when he rushed back into Mrs Snape's room, the little boy woke up. Moore remembered saying him that his name was Harry and other titbits of three year old babble. Poor little Harry.

He found a seat next to an elderly lady as the train left the station with a groan. The lady was knitting. Moore was suddenly reminded of an innocent question he overheard little green-eyed Harry asking his father later on.

_When will mummy wake up and finish knitting me my jumper?_

So she was knitting her son her jumper? Moore closed his eyes sadly. It was unlikely that the garment would ever be completed now. A sudden surge of anger charged through him. This whole situation was so unfair! The hospital needed funding right this instant if a cure for this unknown disease was to be found. Otherwise, if the statistics of the people who were dying from this disease were correct and the figures kept rising, an entire generation would die out!

As the train lurched to a halt, Moore stood up to exit. He was still thinking about Mr Snape and his son.

_I will find a cure to the disease that claimed your wife Severus Snape. And if we don't get funding from the Ministry, we will find another way. I promise._

The blasted disease had taken too many lives. Healer Rowan Moore had had enough.


	3. Laughter is the Best Medicine

This chapter starts quite sad but ends on a lighter note. Please leave a review and tell me what you think.

A soft knock at the door startled Remus Lupin out of his reverie. He lifted his weary body off the couch and went to answer the door. He was almost certain who it was. Sure enough, James Potter and Sirius Black were standing on the threshold. He stepped aside so the pair could enter the house.

"How is he?" James questioned as soon as they were seated in the lounge room. Remus had owled James and Sirius the moment he heard about what happened to Lily.

Remus sighed. "As well as one can expect to be after losing a loved one. I sent Severus straight to bed after giving him a vial of Calming Draught and Dreamless Sleep."

"Does Harry know?" Sirius asked, concerned. He was, after all, the child's godfather.

"He thinks Lily is simply asleep. The poor boy keeps going on about that jumper she was knitting. Harry's asleep in my room at the moment." Remus twisted his hands in his lap. This was awful. Severus had lost the only woman he had ever loved and Harry had lost his mother.

James fell back against the couch, groaning miserably. "Do the Healers know what happened? I mean, Lily was perfectly healthy!"

Remus shook his head sadly. "I spoke to the Head Healer about it when I went to pick Harry and Severus up. He said it's an unknown disease that is becoming fairly common. Five people have died from it this month alone."

A bleak silence fell upon the room. No one knew what to say and the pain of losing Lily, their dear friend Lily, was almost too much to bear.

Remus slumped low in his seat. He was aware that Sirius and James were conversing in low voices again, but he wasn't listening. How can this have happened? He saw Lily earlier that week when he picked up his Wolfsbane Potion from Severus. She was fine, her usual bubbly and cheerful self. Lily had always stood up for Remus and was always there for him, her trust in him never wavering even when she found out about his lycanthropy. She was one of his best friends. And now Lily was gone. Dead.

_Lily Snape is dead._

The realization hit Remus with the force of a herd of stampeding elephants. He felt physically sick, the bile rising up in his throat.

"I need some air." Remus stood and stumbled out of the room. James and Sirius exchanged an alarmed look and rushed after him. They were too late. The splatter of sick against the floor greeted them as they rushed out into the hall. Remus lay slumped on the floor, his hand shakily dabbing at his mouth. Sirius pulled out his wand and cleaned the mess away while James leant at Remus' side.

"Moony..." James didn't know what to say. His friend's face was pale and drawn and the numerous scars that marred his visage stood out like beacons. James squatted down and placed Remus' head on his lap.

"This can't have happened. She didn't deserve to die." Remus moaned, tears leaking from the corners of his eyes.

"We know, Moony." Sirius soothed Remus after cleaning the mess. "What happened hasn't even sunk in yet. I can scarcely believe it. But we need to stay strong and-" Sirius' voice shook and broke off when he saw Remus' tortured expression. He fell against the wall and slid to the floor, his wavy hair flopping in front of his handsome features.

"We need to stay strong for Severus and Harry." James continued. His cheeks glistened with his own tears and a sob threatened to escape. "They need us more than anything at the moment. It will be ok. We'll all pull through." The trio succumbed to their grief and simply lay in the middle of the floor, glad to at least have each other.

Harry's eyes fluttered open as sunlight streamed in through a chink in the curtains. Yawning widely, the little boy climbed out of bed and took in his surroundings. He definitely was not at home. But as soon as he spotted the stuffed toy wolf on the dresser, Harry immediately knew he was in Uncle Moony's house. Uncle Moony loved toy wolves. He had even given Harry one once.

Excited to be at the home of one of his daddy's best friends, Harry ran out of the room as fast as his little legs could carry him. What he saw just outside the hall surprised him greatly. It appeared to be a jumble of body parts, sprawled all over the floor! Yes, he could see an arm, a foot, another arm and a tangle of hair. Harry timidly walked closer, puzzled by this weird shape that prevented him from moving further down the hall.

The sun shone unpleasantly in Severus' face as he sat up in bed. He looked around sleepily and took in the surroundings of Remus Lupin's guest room. The events of the previous night came flooding back to him.

Lily.

Severus could no longer cry, no longer feel, no longer _care_. He was an empty shell, devoid of all emotion. He just didn't have anything left in him. Gone was the heartbreak, and now, replacing it, was this horrid feeling of _emptiness_. Severus numbly got out of bed and walked to the en suite. He shut the door and caught his haggard face in the mirror. He was extremely pale with dark purple shadows under both eyes. He needed to shave too; Severus ruminated as he noticed the dark stubble covering his jaw.

He turned the tap and splashed some water on his face. That will have to do for now.

God, he felt so empty it was unbearable. There was a gaping hole where his heart should have been and it hurt like hell. Lily was gone and taken his heart with her. Dead, gone, never to return.

Severus couldn't remember the last time he felt like this. In fact, he didn't think he had ever felt like this. The only thing that was keeping him alive now was Harry. Harry needs him. Severus needs to be there for his son when he realises what happened to his mummy, needs to be there when he is sad, when he is confused, when he is scar-

"Aaah!"

"Harry!"

Harry was staring right at the mass of body parts on the floor. He couldn't make out who it was. Or who it wasn't. Feeling brave (and feeling a need to get past this creature that was blocking his way), Harry bent down, put out a chubby finger and prepared to place it inside an object that appeared to be a nose. Little Harry couldn't be sure, of course. The "nose" was protruding out from a mass of wavy hair. He didn't know if it was actually a "nose" anyway. So, throwing caution to the wind, Harry stuck his finger up the "nose".

An almighty sneeze shook the house.

"Aaah!" screamed a terrified Harry. The jumble of body parts jerked suddenly and three heads popped up from awkward angles.

"Harry!" Severus sprinted out into the hall and skidded to a halt when he spotted the odd scene that was playing out before him. Harry, who seemed to have gotten over his fright, was peering curiously at the three people in front of him. Remus, James and Sirius were trying desperately to untangle themselves.

"Achoo!"

Sirius sneezed loudly once more.

"Damn you Sirius! What a lovely way to wake someone up!" grumbled James, who was still struggling to sit up.

"Hey, it wasn't my fault! That little imp stuck his finger up my nose! Of course I sneezed, what would you have done?" Sirius complained loudly.

"Guys, shut up! I'm trying to stand up here." Remus said, his voice muffled by a clump of Sirius' hair that had somehow become lodged in his mouth. He finally got to his feet and spotted Severus gaping at the three of them, his mouth shaped in a perfect o.

"Er, morning Severus?" Remus half greeted, half asked tentatively. "Fancy a spot of breakfast?" Before Severus could respond, there was a loud crash. Remus spun around to see James rubbing his head and Sirius nursing his arm. Muttering and swearing could be heard from the pair.

"You two are insufferable." Remus sighed exasperatedly.

Harry looked from his daddy standing in the middle of the hall, to Uncle Moony and to Uncle Prongs and Padfoot, who were on the floor. The grown-ups looked so funny! He couldn't help it. A giggle escaped from his mouth. Everyone stared to watch him and that just made him giggle even harder. Soon enough, the black haired boy was straight out laughing. Not a moment later, James and Sirius let out a loud snort each. Remus chuckled nervously and chanced a glance at Severus. His jaw was still hanging open.

"Daddy!" gasped Harry, who had managed to stop laughing for a moment. "You look funny!" and with that, he fell into a heap of giggles once more.

With one glance at his son, Severus was laughing too. And it felt amazing. Perhaps his life was worth living after all. He was suddenly reminded of something he overhead Lily telling Harry once.

_"Darling, if ever you are sad or angry, just laugh. Laugh at everything and anything. It doesn't matter what, just laugh. I promise you'll feel better."_

Severus surveyed the scene around him. Lily would have loved this. Harry's melodious laugh was infectious and with Sirius, James and Remus' voices were thrown into the mix, it was like a madhouse. This was all Harry's doing. What would they do without the little imp?

_Stay strong for Harry? That's bollocks. My son will stay strong for me._


	4. With the Angels

Harry finds out what happened to his Mummy. A potentially triggering chapter.

"Thank you for the breakfast Remus, but we really must be going." Severus said, plucking Harry up from his chair at the dining table. James and Sirius had already left, having given Severus their condolences and telling him that they would be there for him at any time if he wanted to talk.

Remus stared hard at Severus. "Are you sure you're alright Severus?" He asked, concerned for his friend. Severus gave a brief but firm nod. "Okay Severus, but please don't hesitate to call if you need anything, anything at all."

Remus reached out and grasped Severus' shoulder. Severus didn't like to see his friend so worried about him, but appreciated the gesture nonetheless.

"Thank you again for your kindness Remus. And don't worry; I'll still brew the Wolfsbane for you."

Remus snorted as Severus made sure Harry was ready to leave.

"Come along Harry, we're going home now. Say bye to Uncle Moony." Severus said to the small boy who promptly gave Remus a big hug around the knees.

"Bye bye Uncle Moony! I really liked sleeping in your room, but maybe next time I can sleep on the floor like you did!" Harry said brightly.

Both men laughed at Harry's declaration. Remus picked him up and gave him a warm hug in return. "You're welcome to stay here anytime you like Harry. But I need to ask you to do something very important." Remus whispered in Harry's ear. "You need to take very good care of your daddy okay? Be a good little boy."

"I promise. I'm very good at looking after my toys, so I can be good at looking after Daddy too." Harry said solemnly.

"Of course you will be." Said Remus as he set the boy back down on the floor. He led the way to the front door. "Well goodbye you two, take care of yourselves."

"Yes you too Remus. I'll let you know about... future arrangements." Severus said sadly. It only just occurred to him that there would have to be a funeral in the near future and that was something he definitely was not looking forward to.

With an understanding nod from Remus, Severus and Harry Apparated away.

The pair arrived just inside the gate of their modest home. A few metres ahead of them was the cream coloured front door. A door which, when opened, would allow Severus and Harry access to the house a wife and mother died in. But of course, Harry didn't know that yet.

Severus stared ahead, the front door staring innocently back. He couldn't go in.

"Daddy, what's the matter? Are we going inside?" Severus glanced down at his son who was peering anxiously at him.

"Yes of course Harry. Sorry about that, I was feeling a bit dizzy after Apparating." Severus lied.

"Oh yes Daddy! Sometimes I feel like that too! Don't worry Daddy, I think it's normal." Little Harry assured him. He gave his father a huge grin and bounced towards the front door. "Come on Daddy!"

A slight smile quirked Severus' lips as he observed Harry's antics. But it was a very brief moment of happiness. Steeling himself, Severus took a step towards the front door. It was coming closer, coming closer with every step. Too soon he was at the door he dreaded opening. A door that marked the entrance of the house Lily died in. He almost felt sick with dread. But it was inevitable. He had to open the door.

Taking a deep, calming breath, Severus unlocked the door, watching enviously as Harry cheerfully ran into the house and up the stairs. He still was yet to tell his son what happened to Mummy. A tight knot clenched in Severus' stomach. There it was again. Dread.

When Harry got to his bedroom, he noticed he had forgotten something. Someone, rather. Where was Mummy? He hadn't seen her in a while. A frown creased the small boy's face as he struggled to recall the events of the previous night. Mummy was asleep in the white room wasn't she?

_Why didn't we go back and wake her up? Mummy can't be sleepy anymore._

Harry simply couldn't figure it out. If Daddy and he were at home, Mummy had to be with them too. He supposed he should go and ask Daddy about it.

Harry plodded out of his bedroom and down the stairs in the very careful way of a three year old. He caught sight of Daddy in the kitchen, nursing a mug of tea.

_Daddy looks upset. Maybe he's still feeling dizzy._

The young boy thought this had to be the case.

As Severus sat at the kitchen bench sipping at his tea, he heard footsteps on the stairs. Harry. Severus knew it was time. He had to explain to his son what happened.

"Hello Daddy! You still look kinda dizzy." Harry chirped.

"Hey there buddy. I'm not dizzy but I need to tell you something." Severus said, almost succeeding in keeping the shakiness of his voice at bay. He gathered Harry up in his arms and sat back down holding his son on his lap.

"But Daddy, I wanted to know where Mummy was. Don't we need to go wake her up?" Harry asked innocently, looking straight into Severus' eyes.

He older man's breath hitched in his throat. "Yes, that was what I was going to talk to you about. Harry, we can't go and wake her up."

Harry giggled. "Yes we can Daddy. It's easy! I jump on you when it's Christmas and that wakes you up."

Severus couldn't even manage a smile at Harry's words. "It isn't quite like that, buddy. Mummy's not going to wake up."

The smile slid off Harry's face in an instant. "What do you mean?"

"Harry, Mummy is with... She's with the angels now." Severus said, choking back a sob. This was the most horrible feeling in the world. He wouldn't wish this feeling on his worst enemy. He was telling a child that his mother died.

"With the angels? Mummy's in the sky isn't she?" Pots and pans started to rattle and the sound of breaking china could be heard. Harry's emotions were too strong and his magic was getting out of control.

"She's in heaven, isn't she? Mummy's DEAD!" Harry screamed, great tears starting to fall down his cheeks. "I want my MUMMY!" With a heart-wrenching shriek, Severus was immobilised as he watched Harry jumped off his lap and sprint out of the kitchen. There was an almighty bang and Severus became aware that Harry's uncontrolled magic had blasted the front door open. This snapped him into action.

"Harry!" Severus bolted out of the kitchen, but his socked feet slipped on the floor. He fell painfully on his elbow, a stabbing sensation shooting up his arm. "Shit!" Severus cursed as he stumbled to his feet. But he didn't care that his elbow was probably broken. Harry had just run out the door, potentially on to the road.

Severus sprinted out of the house and looked frantically up and down the road, his face the epitome of sheer terror. He couldn't see Harry anywhere.

"HARRY! Please, where are you?" Not knowing where he was going, Severus turned and sprinted up the footpath. "Harry! HARRY! Please come back!" Severus begged, praying with all his might that Harry wasn't hurt. He had just lost Lily. He only had Harry now. He couldn't lose him too.

Harry ran. He didn't know where he was going but he didn't care. Mummy was dead and he wanted her back.

"Mummy come back now! You're not dead! Daddy's a big, stupid, ugly liar! YOU'RE NOT DEAD!" Harry shrieked at the top of his lungs, tears cascading down his face. But he still ran as fast as he could. He didn't want to go back.

With tears blurring his vision, Harry couldn't see where he was going at all. He just kept running. Little did he know he was heading straight towards an oncoming car.

"Elizabeth, I'm so sorry I had to ruin our outing like this, but this is really urgent." Healer Rowan Moore was at the steering wheel of his car, his wife at his side. Technically the car belonged to his Muggle-born wife who disliked magical modes of travel.

"Honestly it's fine, dear. I understand what your job involves; I've known it since before I married you." Elizabeth gave her husband a wry smile. "We can always go later."

Rowan laughed. "I can't believe I met someone as understanding as you. But this is very important. Remember how I told you about the Snape's?" His wife nodded. "Well, the victim's body is ready to be given to her family so they can have the funeral. I must tell this to Mr Snape."

"How awful." Elizabeth murmured. They drove in silence for a while.

Suddenly, a small shape caught Elizabeth's eye. There was someone on the road! "Rowan stop! There's a child on the road!" The car screeched to a halt, mere metres from a shape in the form of a little boy.

Finally, Severus caught sight of Harry running across the road. "Harry!" Severus shouted, terrified that a car would come along any moment. He knew he could never get to his son in time if the worst happened; he was too far away.

Harry spun around at the sound of his father's voice. "Go away, I hate you!" Harry screeched, the anger in his voice breaking Severus' heart. The little boy turned on his heel and ran up the road.

"Come back!" Severus bolted from where he was standing on the footpath, but suddenly, something caught his eye. A white car, speeding towards his son. "Harry!" Severus gave a strangled moan. He was rooted to the spot, he could only watch as the car came closer and closer, he could see Harry's eyes widening as he saw the car. But miraculously, the driver of the car seemed to have seen Harry too.

"Harry," Severus murmured. "You're ok."

Please leave me a review and tell me what you think! Healer Moore will make more of an appearance in the next chapter, which should be up by mid-November.


	5. Light at the End of the Tunnel

Severus was tired. He was so very, very tired. Yet he could not sleep. His bleary eyes focused on Harry who was curled up in a ball on his lap. There were tear tracks on his face. The boy merely gazed up into Severus' face, not saying anything at all.

_He must be exhausted._

"Harry," His hoarse whisper broke the kitchen's silence. The pair had been sitting on the kitchen floor since Healer Moore left earlier that day. Of course it would have been more comfortable in the living room, but neither Severus nor Harry were keen on going in that particular room. "It's time you went to bed buddy."

Harry mumbled something incoherent and pressed his face into his father's stomach. Knowing that Harry would not get up, Severus carefully stood up, holding the boy securely in his arms, making sure not to jolt his elbow too badly. The Skele-Gro was taking effect. Luckily it was just a mild fracture.

_Straight to bed with you._

Severus carried his son up the stairs, making sure to grab a vial of Dreamless Sleep on the way to Harry's room. He doubted Harry would even remember being given the potion by morning.

He carefully set his son down on the bed, changing him into pyjamas with a half-hearted flick of his wand. Harry was still gazing up at him. "Stay with me?" Harry asked softly.

Severus' heart broke for Harry. He couldn't imagine what he must be going through. Severus lost his wife and best friend, but to lose a mother... Severus couldn't, wouldn't, compare the deaths of his parents to Lily's passing. He barely knew them. His father was a pitiful drunk and an abusive man and his mother a weak, wasted woman who did not care a whit for her son. Severus did not mourn them, as horrible as it sounded. But Lily... This was entirely different.

"Yes of course Harry. But I must do something first, I won't be more than ten minutes. Will you be okay?" Severus was anxious to get back to Harry as soon as possible, but there was something pressing on his mind. He only just remembered.

Harry nodded wearily. Severus looked around for a moment and spotted Harry's favourite stuffed toy on the bookshelf. It was a doe. Lily bought the toy while shopping one day, falling in love with it instantly.

_"Look what I found Sev!" Lily announced as she entered the house._

_"Hello love, what have you got there?" Severus strode into the front hall, looking at Lily's shopping. She only went to buy a present for Molly and Arthur's son Ron for his birthday, but it seemed she had bought something extra._

_Lily reached into one of her bags and pulled out a light brown furry thing. At least that's what it looked like to Severus._

_"What's this?" He asked, smiling._

_"It's a stuffed doe. Isn't it lovely? I saw it and just had to buy it for Harry. It's both of us, see?" Both Lily and Severus' Patronus was a doe, a perfect match for each other. Lily leaned in closer to Severus, planting a kiss on his cheek._

_"It's perfect Lily flower." _

_Simple words though they may be, but Lily knew Severus liked it. _

Severus plucked it off the shelf and gently handed it to Harry, the boy reaching his chubby arms out for his favourite toy. "Thank you." Harry murmured as his eyes drifted shut. Severus, a small sad smile on his lips, leaned down and kissed Harry's head, soft jet black hair tickling his nose. "I'll be back soon." Severus whispered into his hair. With that, Severus left the room and headed for that dreaded room. The living room.

Severus knew he had to go in. He could not avoid it forever. Too soon he found himself at the doorway. He looked into the room, trying to keep his eyes from watering, his lips from trembling. Everything was so still. He could hardly believe that his beloved Lily had passed away in this very room. The cream coloured walls, the squashy couches, the lamp, the fireplace, they all were mocking him.

_Your wife is dead, but here we are, exactly the same. Untouched. Untarnished. _

And then... then he caught sight of the half-finished jumper, still lying innocently on the couch. It too, mocked him.

A sudden surge of anger coursed through him. He wanted to rip, tear, _destroy_ the wretched jumper. Knitting was the last thing Lily did before she died and it seemed that by destroying the jumper, she would somehow return to life. Breathing heavily, Severus snatched the jumper off the couch, the ball of yarn that was attached to it bouncing on the floor. He barely restrained from tearing the jumper to pieces. Taking a deep breath, Severus tried to calm himself.

_Stop. You're being irrational. _

Clutching the jumper in a tight fist, he left the room and headed for his bedroom. He didn't have to break it but he never wanted to see the jumper again. Throwing open the bedroom door, Severus stalked to the wardrobe, digging into its depths. It was dark. He hadn't bothered turning on the light and a simple Lumos was beyond him at the moment. His fingers scratched against cardboard and he knew he found what he was looking for. A box. His anger hadn't abated as he slammed the box onto the carpeted floor, took the lid off and flung the jumper into it. The box was then thrown under the bed. Severus hoped with all his heart he would never have to see it again.

The rest of his body seemed to catch up with the trauma of the day. He was exhausted. His elbow was sore. Everything was sore. He slumped back on the bed, closing his eyes tightly. How he wished this was all a horrible nightmare. Healer Moore's voice replayed in his mind.

_Your wife's body is ready for the funeral._

He couldn't believe that today had only been one day. Remus' house, Healer Moore, talking about the funeral. To top it off, Harry had almost gotten hit by a car for Merlin's sake!

Harry was fine after that ordeal, though a little shaken. Severus could not believe how close Harry had been to death. He remembered how his heart almost stopped in terror, how he was rooted to the spot, unable to move and rescue his son. Thank god Healer Moore stopped the car in time.

_The car screeched to a halt. Harry looked up, surprise and shock written all over his face. Severus came to his senses and sprinted over to his son and the now stationary car. He saw two people, a man and a woman, scrambling out, anxious to see whether the boy they so very nearly hit was unhurt. There was something familiar about the man. Severus was sure he'd seen him before. His eyes suddenly widened in realisation. Healer Moore!_

_Severus arrived at the scene just as Moore and the woman, who looked to be his wife, recognised Harry. Moore looked up and caught sight of Severus._

_"Mr. Snape! We are so sorry! Your son came from nowhere." He explained. The woman nodded frantically. _

_Severus inclined his head. "It's not your fault." But that didn't matter at the moment. Severus stooped to Harry's eye level. "Are you alright?" He asked concerned. His voice was calm, but his heart was thumping so hard it hurt. Harry nodded, a tear rolling down his cheek. Then another one came. And another. A sob followed soon after. And then Harry was crying, unable to contain his grief. He launched himself at his father, crying bitterly. Strong arms wrapped around Harry's small body._

_"I'm sorry Daddy, I didn't mean it. I don't hate you." Harry sobbed, his voice muffled against his father's chest. Severus didn't say anything. He didn't need to. Harry was safe._

_Severus momentarily forgot that they weren't alone. Moore and his wife stood silently, watching. Then Moore spoke. "Mr. Snape we are terribly sorry for all this." _

_Severus looked up into Moore's worried face. "It's okay, Healer. It wasn't your fault. You see..." He trailed off, swallowing a sob that was threatening to escape. "I told Harry."_

_Moore knew exactly what Severus was talking about. He surmised Harry had run away, trying to escape the reality of his mother's death._

_"I actually came to tell you something. Perhaps we should find somewhere private?" Moore suggested. "I don't want to trouble you but this is important."_

_Severus nodded. What Healer Moore had to tell him must be about Lily. "Of course. We can go back to our house, it's not too far." _

_"Excellent. We can all go in the car if you like?" Moore said, eyeing Severus warily. Driving definitely was not the preferred mode of transport among wizards. _

_Severus supposed there was no other way. They couldn't just leave the car. "That will be fine." He was about to help Harry into the car when a stabbing sensation shot up his arm. He gasped. It did not go unnoticed by the Healer._

_"Are you alright Mr. Snape?"_

_"Fine. I fell on my elbow before. I only just remembered it now." Severus admitted. _

_"Perhaps I should take a look?" With Severus' consent, Healer Moore ran a quick diagnostic spell on him. "It's fractured. Some Skele-Gro will fix it up just fine, it's only mild." _

_"I believe I have some Skele-Gro at home." Severus said. Nodding approvingly, Moore motioned everyone to get in the car. His wife gave him a tentative smile. _

_"Oh how rude of me! In all this excitement, I've forgotten to introduce my wife, Elizabeth."_

_The three adults were all seated in the kitchen, steaming cups of tea held in their hands. Severus had avoided the living room at all costs. Moore seemed to understand his aversion, suggesting they sit in the kitchen instead. They sipped quietly for a moment when Healer Moore placed his cup on his saucer and broke the silence._

_"Mr. Snape, the reason for my visit was to inform you that your wife's body is ready for the funeral." Moore said quietly. He hated this part of his job. It was almost has bad as telling a patient's family that they had died. Telling families and friends that a body was ready for the funeral brought on all sorts of emotions. Funerals were final. It signified that a loved one really was gone. _

_Severus was stunned. This was it. He was going to bury his wife. Moore talked on, mentioning funeral costs and wills. Severus listened, trying to take it in. The words washed over him, overwhelming him. _

Lily's really gone.

_The time soon came for the Healer and Mrs. Moore to leave. Severus walked them both to the door. When Elizabeth left for the car, Moore turned to Severus. "I couldn't say this before, as Elizabeth is not supposed to hear everything, but we are trying our hardest to find out more about this blasted disease. I swear I will do all I can." _

_"Yes of course. Thank you very much Healer, your kindness is much appreciated." Severus said gratefully._

_Moore gave him a brief smile as they clasped hands. "I'll keep in touch. And please, call me Rowan." _

Severus eyes flew open. Harry asked for him to stay with him. Soft sunlight was streaming in through the gap in the curtains. It was morning.

"Shit." He muttered. He only meant to close his eyes for a moment, but his body succumbed to its exhaustion. He stood up and stretched, glancing at the clock on the bedside table. 6:05. There was still enough time to go up to Harry.

Severus softly padded up the stairs and entered Harry's room. He was surprised to see his son sitting up in bed, playing with a loose thread on the ear of his doe. Harry looked up when he heard Severus enter the room. "Where were you Daddy?" Harry asked sternly. Or as stern as a three year old could possibly be.

"I'm so sorry buddy. I did what I meant to do and I meant to come back upstairs but I was so tired I fell asleep. When I woke up it was morning." Severus took a seat on the side of Harry's bed. "I am sorry."

"That's okay. I was okay." Harry held up his doe. "She looked after me. And no bad dreams."

"No dreams at all?" Severus asked, carding his fingers through Harry's hair. It seemed the potion had done its job.

"No bad dreams." Harry repeated with a firm nod of his head. "But Mummy came to me."

Severus fingers released Harry's hair. "Mummy came to you?" He asked in a whisper, more to himself than his son.

"Yes. She said I was brave. And you are brave too. And she loves us very, very much." Harry leaned in closer to Severus, as if he wanted to tell him a secret. "I think the angels let Mummy come down and talk to me for a bit." Harry whispered.

Severus smiled. Harry was probably right.


End file.
